Our sex pros weigh in on every aspect of your jerk off material--including your cocks. Even you "vanilla porn" types might learn a thing or two.

Sometimes a sex vacation can be painful. Follow this expert advice to avoid any unpleasant turns or limp penises.

1. Getting in shape - "Take muscle building classes before you go: weight lifting works the whole body, stretches muscles, and gets you used to balancing. You don't want to wake up after your first day and be too sore to jerkoff." Joan Mather, editor, National Jerking Off Association Journal

2. Packing Fudge - "Most airlines let you travel with a skin rag as one of your checked bags. Just be aware of the weight allowance." Sara Doan, Handjob International Tug Team, "Anal sex movies featuring female bodybuilders can really do the trick!"

3. Sex Rentals - "If you're renting a girl, call ahead to reserve a muscle slut who sucks like a newborn. Don't settle for some skinny old bag. There's no worse nightmare than dealing with a granny who has that sickening old lady smell." Grace Nickel, head women's bodybuilding coach, U.S. Sex Team

4. Acclimating - Most sex guides say "I never have sex the first day. Your body is tired, so you're at greater risk of scrotal injury. Go for a walk or run instead. It'll help you adjust to the constant cumming and jerking." - "Bullshit!" says Lisa Demmore, head cock teaser at the Ladies Sex Gym, "Get to your room, dial in some muscle sluts sex movies and work that big hard cock like a kid with a new playstation!"

5. Selecting Sex Movies - "Call a sex shop near the resort and reserve demos of female muscle porn. They're high-end sex that won't make you look like a loser, the way most rentals do." Jane Salol, Muscle slut and Gigantrix Muscle Blog advisor. "Or you can just select some of the titles we have hand-picked for you below-"